FML, SMH, IRL....whatever!

Fads/Sayings have a shelf life, so I've been told. When your grandmother gets in on the action you can officially say "that is so yesterday..." But what happens when you're a 31 yr old woman who witnessed the birth of the information super highway, grew up in the dot.com age and still hasn't a clue about what's hip, cool or popular? What then? Am I fad roadkill? Did I metaphorically get run over by the short bus to popular town with grandma at the wheel?

My glaring lack of hipness went all Chuck Norris on me last week when during a business luncheon with a potential client she fist bumped me across the table.

"Ya girl, that was a good sales pitch!" [bump]

The client was probably mid 40's and white. Not that it truly mattered, but it helps to quantify the situation. I hesitantly jerked my own hand into a fist, bumped her back and forced a smile. My face a clear signal I was befuddled while my head is screaming "What the hell just happened??"

This unfortunately is not an isolated incident. I often find myself Googling stuff I come across because I haven't a clue what the hell someone is talking about. Google, being the trusted reliable friend it is, keeps my secret.

The husband is even a constant reminder that I'm behind the times with my 2yr old blackberry. His "fancy" phone can do all sorts of things mine can't.

The husband: "Check this out! I can text you without touching a button! Watch this, watch this! Did you get it?? Sweet huh??" [nodding]

Me: [looking down at the text message] "Yea, whatever...."

The husband: [baby talking] "Aww don't be sore that you're crappy phone isn't sweet like mine. You can have mine when I upgrade to the newest thing next year!"

Not wanting to let the husband know I covet his "fancy" phone that plays angry birds; me, my pride and my crappy blackberry walked out of the room.